I'm Back

Forgive me, non-existent readers.
I have been out of touch lately and i have to write down a few new things here.

Last night I was falling into sleep while watching tv and i thought about this page and wondered why i hadn't written lately so...here goes.

My life has been utterly stubborn. It will not go anywhere. It is like a lawnmower that sits in one place. Just swinging away and not progressing in cutting up anything else within its path.

I have a newfound zeal for aggressively advancing myself through Hickory High's social minefield.

I must say, it is going quite...in fact...extremely well.

Hahahahaha my dear readers, i am so pleased with myself.

Currently I am laughing hysterically.

I should also post that video I was promising everyone, but I just can't seem to get around to it.

Maybe some short stories? I'll see what i have time for...

My fellow pessimists, I say to you, goodnight.

Suburban Monotony

Idiots are a good thing to have in your neighboorhood.

It gives one something to study and watch as they carry out the monotonous task that is each and everyone of their lives.

Everyday I see them outside falling over, struggling. It can become quite entertaining, especially when you learn to time certain events such as when neighboors leave and return home and what they do at specific times of the week as well.

For those of you who think I am into breaking and entering, actually I observe just to observe. For some reason I enjoy watching other people. It's like going to the zoo...at least in our day and age.

My day was long. I played another show at the theater in Norfolk. It went pretty well but i am tired.

How was your day?
Post it in my comments and i'll try to care ):-)

Tired of Aggravated Librarians.

I'd like to log another, if you will, injustice.
Today I had to leave my english class.

At first it was relief but then i arrived at the library to be confronted by three librarians. I was interrogated over a book that one of them forgot to check as they checked it out to me.

Needless to say i was angry.

I was screamed at for about twenty minutes I finally was let off after specifically telling them that I had checked out the book already in that condition (which was the truth). All of this hell was raised over a small stain on the backside of the book.

Bitchy librarians are a curse of the world. The book was not heavily damaged and i acknowledged the stain as i walked out.

I suppose it is my fault for not saying anything about it but honestly, I'm refuse to bitch about a two-inch soda stain on the back of a book from the school library. Which is what they wanted me to do.

They ranted at me for 20 minutes about how "perfect" the library is and how the school is and how the librarians are enforcers of library cleanliness and how they love their books (that aren't theirs) and then just brushed it off...

I am pissed.

"Hickory Hawks are Hickory Vultures. The bleach-blonde scavengers feed on a carrion of drama and lies."

This is simply an announcement. It's a little lengthy, so deal with it.

That odd little click sound that sounds like a broken conveyor belt is my halfway busted camera.

Dream Mask

This, ladies and gentlemen, is my latest creation. This is a different design i have decided to use and i hope you don't mind.

I was inspired by a dream a longtime ago. In fact it was a nightmare...so i faced my fear and made the face.

It is pretty much the same as the other mask but i have added a few new things to it as you can see.

I expierienced along with this nightmare "sleep paralysis" and a tall figure was walking with this face, next to my bed.

I have conquered my fear, and taken its face as my own.

Judge me, I Judge You.

I absolutely adore revenge. In fact, i've come to believe that it is one of the more wonderful things in the world. I absolutely hate people that tell me how negative i am. That is one of the most aggravating things in the world. It rips and tears at my nerves like a ravenous beast.

Go ahead and judge me in your mind and call me a pessimist all you want, but i don't want to hear (or see) one fucking word. If you have got such a problem with my attitude then don't talk to me or bother me about it. Don't waste my time.

Where i go to school, it is full of idiots. They carry one mind, and that is to root out and destroy loners and negativity. I am full of negativity and i dish it out to EVERYBODY as i see fit. I do not forgive, and i never forget.

It can be as small as a pencil i loned you and you never gave back,
A book that you borrowed and returned late,
I will remember it. And i will seek retribution in whatever form.

Idiots and forgetful person(s) beware.

Today was horrible. My cello was locked in the band room by the everforgetful and absent conductor. So I spent today without it and I'm pissed. It is one of the few things in this world that i enjoy, besides revenge and...her.....it is almost impossible to manage my short temper without it.

Yet somehow I hold the perfect grades that I do and manage to silently make my way through the day...

Truly I would be nothing without her or my cello.

They complete me. They fill the void in my life that was ripped in me when i moved to this hellish redneck land.

Away all of my friends were taken, along with my happiness, my soul, and my way of being.

The urban air is gone, the giant empty concrete buildings i explored, the walls i tagged, and above all my dearly beloved hill on an empty part of town, where i could sit and enjoy the sound of the wind. No one was ever on that hill.

It was my playground of solitude and thought. Where i could be alone and think while i inhaled the smoggy air and be with my own mind for hours on end.

Now my room is all i have. Away from the wretched suburbs and the everdreaded high school.

Silence resides only in here, and within me.

We were not, Are not, and Will Never be....

Earth is oddly the only planet with life and water. It is the only planet that is known to have “intelligent” life. But we are not the world. We do not make it spin on its axis. We do not power the weather. In a sense we do because of the impact we have created. But when we are gone, the world will not remember, it cannot, and it will not.

We have blinded ourselves to the fact that our existence is as pointless as the universe is gigantic. We may be the result of a reaction between particles, the creation of a God, but I refuse to stand by the fact that we are what make the world turn. We fight wars and kill each other to claim some sort of progress, physical or psychological, it does not do any good, then again, all considered, what does? Seeing as it will rot away along with the rest of our existence will over a geologically short period of time.

We are not the world. We are a specific type of mammal that thrives on self destruction. The Earth does not need us. It never did. When we’re gone it will be, finally, silent once more. When we’re gone it cannot and will not care. It and the universe will go on existing eternally. Regardless of how much we want to be omnipotent, and powerful. We are not the world.